If you’re reading this… this most likely applies to you. Today, I was going to publish a post about things I’ve never experienced and things I wish would happen, but some how I messed up and deleted all the progress I made on that (this is fate telling me to stfu, I just might be in that lil depressed s*** phase in the future and end up posting a new version but for now this is what I’m feeling). But, I had a whole different idea about what to publish for the last few days, something a little more upbeat, a little more real, and has a lot more love. Anyways, as I said, my last post was going to be about being unsatisfied about a lot of things, like not having as much fun as I should as a 17 year old should be having. I’ve come to learn that I’ve been taking so much for granted.
Of course I love going out into the town and doing adventurous things like how this past sumer I’ve gone to St.Louis quite a few times just with my friends, but also, the other day, it was just my friends and I in a McDonalds talking about nothing in particular and it was one of the best days of summer so far. I really felt my age, I felt like I was behaving how I should be. Alejandra was driving her rover, Kate in the passenger side, Esmeralda and I in the back, just really enjoying each other’s company. Although everyone does have their own problems happening at the moment, it was still really great just to hang out with them and forget about all the first world problems we’re having.
I really, really do love my friends, I want you all to know I appreciate you guys in my life more than you would ever know. I appreciate you guys more than Nathan Adrian. A lot of you guys probably don’t know this, but my freshman year of high school I was depressed AF. I literally hated myself, I didn’t think I was cool enough to hang out with anybody and I definitely didn’t think I was pretty. I basically felt useless. That’s why you guys sometimes see me in that weird phase of being a depressed lil girl where all I need is a hug (Idk I just get back to my old place every once in a while). You guys basically made me feel like I’m doing something in my life.
You guys made me feel wanted and beautiful and I don’t think anyone else could have done that besides you guys.
I think it’s pretty clear that I’m a really affectionate friend, I’ll hold your hand or give you hugs all the time because that’s the only way I can show you how much I love you.
This was literally written without any sort of editing so sorry about that.
I have so much to say but I don’t want to waste your time, ANYWAYS I LOVE YOU GUYS.